Tuesday, 10 January 2017


Trust me you do not want this little bastard, Campylobacteriosis. Around the sixth of December I had a bad case of the shits for around five days, real the world falling out of your arse kind of stuff. One minute I was fine, then the shivers started so I went to bed. Come midnight was the start of five days of making sweet love to my shit house then it went. Hooray, just as well as Denise and I went away for three nights the weekend prior to Christmas.

We came back and so did the shits, but worse this time. Full on stomach cramps, shitting blood, real dark blood too. That was not mentioned to Denise at the time as it would have meant a trip to A&E. I phoned the local Doctors and no appointments were  available, but they could give me a telephone consultation. That done a stool sample was required. If you have never scooped a stool sample, into a stool pot from the comfort of your own privy, well you have not lived. It's akin to juggling in a gimp suit.

To cut a long story short, my results arrived back last week owing to the Christmas holidays. And the result were the above. I've lost over a stone in weight, but feel much, much better now. The cause? Well maybe from food? Or maybe from infected water? It made me think, when fishing and before having a snack, use the bloody antibacterial hand gel that is in the rucksack in future. It scared the life out of me at one stage, using Google to research your symptoms while awaiting your results can lead to a mind fuck. Don't do that, ever!

Managed a couple of very short trips on the bank, that left me feeling shattered after a couple of hours. Plenty of Pike fun on medium sized crankbaits, to keep the rod bending. Saturday week Gruff and I are off to Grafham reservoir for the day, let's hope the fishing picks up, as its fishing rock hard at present we are told. Fingers crossed.

This came into the Yat phone the other day, how true is this? The world and his brother seem to stride the river, canals and lakes at present like an extra from Tron! You need to be of a certain age to remember that out and out gem. Still shits on the latest Star Wars franchise, in my ever so humble opinion. Some good Youtube channels and Paul Bosworth's still leads the way for me. He can laugh at himself and to me that is what fishing should be, a piss take, a laugh. Catch a few, loose a few but just go and do it.

As you were.

Be Lucky

Monty D


  1. Typical bloke - shitting blood but doesn't want to make a fuss. Kills a lot of us fellas that does mate. Anyway, glad your botty is all better. I'm trying to lose weight but will stick to a more long-term plan than yours.

    I bought one of them there mini cameras. Mine's called a Git and yes, I feel like one when I use it.....

    1. Dave,

      I did not fancy spending Christmas in Hospital, if it had continued then yes, I would have popped along. No harm done, but it was a pain. No decent food, only bananas, white bread and boiled rice to try and "bind me up". The Doctor would not prescribe anything until they knew what bug it was.

      By the time my results arrived back, I was fine. As for you with a Gopro, the mind boggles. ;-0

  2. Well that made for a pleasant read over my Sunday brunch! All I can say is rather you than me...Happy New Year!

    And as for the craze in mini camera / go-pro gizmo's, I just don't see the point. In my own minds eye I like to think as myself as some sort of angling god; a combination of cunning watercraft, ninja type stealth, bulls-eye casting, and sublime fish playing skills. The last thing I want is to go home and have all that blown out of the water by watching a video that starkly lays bare my staggering mediocrity (on a good day) for all and sundry. No thanks!

    Good luck at Grafham.