Saturday, 18 October 2014

Fish The Conditions

Last Sunday afternoon the rain fell and continued well into Monday night, it came down unabated. I walked in through the door Monday evening to be greeted thus by the wife. "Whats the matter with you, you have a face like a smacked arse". "River will be over the banks and in the fields by the morning, it will screw up my fishing for this Saturday". "Well you'll have to fish the conditions then babes".

My wife, the apple of my eye was now imparting wisdom on the angling front to me. It comes to something when that happens. She was right of course, the river rose and fell all week. Right up until late yesterday, Gruff popped down and had a look, but lure fishing was out. It had to be Barbel, with conditions as they are.

We both decided to fish a stretch of water that we had not seen for five years, known for big fish and a real ball breaker. In for a penny and all that, we tend to shy away from it owing to the fact it can get very busy. Today no one, just the two of us. Text book conditions, you could not have asked for more and yet we both did not have a touch. Why ? If I knew that, bottling that recipe and flogging it to the gullible would see me a rich man. As I said a ball breaker of a venue, an old boy came down for a walk who I'd not seen since my last visit, he only fishes midweek and has banked Barbel to in excess of sixteen pounds and from the swim I was in, he told me this years back. A real old school gent, a smashing man.

We spent a good half hour chatting, I inquired as to why the banks were so overgrown, where the other anglers are. He let it be known that it's not really fished anymore, he has chalked up twelve blanks on the trot this season. No bites, not a thing.. Sometimes you tend think, that someone is selling you a tall tale to keep you off the bank. Not this guy, honest as the day is long, no need to disbelieve a word he says.

The last few seasons people have mentioned the demise of this area, really, really tough now they bemoan. We do not have a problem with Otters yet, so in my uneducated view it's purely a cycle thing. It's not just here but up and downstream are the same, it's getting bloody hard for some species.

But, a large slack to my right had me salivating. Perch were hammering the shoals of fry, trying to find solace from  the flow. Big broad backed, bristling dorsal fins were showing above the water line again and again. Gruff had the same further down too. Shame I never thought to sling a lure rod into the quiver , got caught out their. But my next session out will see me here with suitable tackle.

I'd love a large Barbel one day over fifteen pounds, the last twelve years or so I could think of nothing else. Fish all day and into dark on a Saturday, twice in the week after work. Not now, just don't have the patience or the time. Maybe that passion will return, though I doubt it. Simply put it was to intense, burnt me out to be fair. Great to catch up with Gruff though and he told me this little story from yesterday.

He was in his local tackle shop talking to Andy the owner, a guy walks in and asks to see some baiting needles. His shown one and reply's "That's no good I'm colour  blind I'll loose it" so he plumps for another one. He then goes onto to ask "Do you have the latest hangers", "Yep we have these mate". "Good I'll have a red and blue one" A real WTF moment for my mate, trying not to piss himself laughing.

Just a couple of photos as no fish to show for today. Some people do not blog blank sessions, but to me it's part and parcel of my angling.

Meet Maggie De Block the new Health Minister for Belgium, now I'll not be rude. But she claims her size is due to "genetics". Fair enough Maggie, you may even be big boned. But how can you have a lady of this curvaceous nature giving health advice?

It's a little like me on a Saturday night, the wife is  working a night shift. I've sunk a bottle of red, time for bed. But decide to have a cheeky nip of Glemorangie as a night cap. Then the phone goes..........

"Monty it's Gazza, your drinking to much pet you need to cut back a little"
"Yeah righto Paul, bye mate"

You see where I'm coming from here?

Enjoy the rest of your weekend.

Be Lucky

Monty D


  1. She likes the occasional sweet, fecking three piece suite by the looks of it.

    It's not her fault its just big bones. .....covered in meat and gravy. !!

    And other such excuses that lazy feckers use.

    Jon pall sigmarsson.

  2. I think your blog is improving with age mate, very enjoiyable ☺

    1. Like fine wine ;-0,Mondays and work, bollocks!

  3. Maggie De Block? I thought it was a doppelganger of Mark 'the beast' Labbett from 'The Chase'. Look it up ;o)
    Entertaining as ever Monty. Better luck next time out!

    1. Richard,

      Top spot, they are like two peas in a pod ;-0

  4. I hope 'big Sam' doesn't look-in here, Monty dear boy; he'ld be right hacked-off wi' no mention of his glorious selections after 3 straight wins and the latest humiliation of the League Champs today! Hope you were ther for this one Montague.... and not fishing some ditch down your way whilst they were performing. Keep well,

    1. Mike,

      Yep I took the old man, he drove up from Leigh-On Sea. Not long home, will update this lot tomorrow when I've calmed down a bit and no doubt sobered up. Buzzing like a Bee ;-0