Saturday, 6 July 2013

British and Irish Lions

Class sheer class.What can you say about that? A total annihilation of the Wallaby's.Now I sorted my tackle last night,deliberating whether to go fishing or pop into the Dukes Head to watch the final Test.I chose the rugby.I can go fishing more or less when I want within reason,but with it being scorching hot the lure of ice cold cider and male bonding won out.The first Lions tour win since 1997 and we stuffed 'em 16-41.Warren Gatland made a brave decision to drop Brian O'Driscoll for the final test,raising more than a few eyebrows myself included.But he has been exonerated with this great,great result.We started well,then let the Wallaby's back into it near the end of the first half and had a slight wobble at the start of the second half.But class will out ;-0

But the scrummage won the match today.We had a decent ref this time out who in my eyes recognised what a "Scrum" should be.I thought we have been harshly penalised  in the previous two tests.I reckon the principality will be celebrating long into the night and rightly so.

Next up The Ashes and more pain I hope for Australia.Having such close links as country's it is like the home nation games of football from years gone by.No hatred what so ever,gloating rights rule the day.That is what sport should be,played with passion it hurts when you loose and elation when you win.Today I'm the latter.

The demise of biscuit dunking has been on my mind a little lately.I just do not see anyone in the South East partake in this great British ritual.And you know who I blame for this phenomenon,Chandler and his friends.You see it's been so trendy for a while now,oh so achingly trendy to "chill" in a coffee shop and look kewl.

When it's not really trendy it just makes you seem like some bourgeoisie wanker and in essence your probably on benefits,sitting in a coffee shop wearing threadbare second hand clothes and a battered copy of The Iliad.Just do not tell Dave Gauntlett that over on Fatwa,for he is a ranting mad man!No the Great British public I beseech thee,put down the "Skinny Decaff","The Mocha" or what ever else and get dunking and put the great back into Great Britain.

The Great British summer has arrived at long last.The parks will be awash with semi naked flesh,being slowly burnt to a crisp.The beaches will be packed with barely room to swing a cat.Old men asleep in their deckchairs,the better half sitting next to him knitting.Kids bawling as they have dropped their ice cream,that has cost Dad the best part of a weeks wages.

We just do not do it with the style and panache of our Mediterranean cousins.They know how to dress with grace and elegance.Your average British male starts OK at the top.Maybe a Panama tiffter,nice polo shirt and some natty shorts.But then they ruin it all with sandals and feet like these!

Gents it is just not on.This is one reason why a Peacock has got that distinctive cry.Their is your Peacock,his going out(or if your Micky Flannagan his going out,out),looking for his Peahen to give her a large portion of well,you can guess.His strutting along thinking "I'm the don of all Peacocks" looking at his reflection in the shop window until he looks down and clocks his feet and then "Meeeeeeeeeewwwwww,Meeeeeeewwwww".Men of Great Britain may I suggest if you have an inherent need to go sock-less,try and cover up with some nice loafers if your over 40,trainers are permissible for the under 40's,not white Reeboks though unless you live on a sink estate and are called Kyle,Reece or Jason.

Hands up who is not having a BBQ this weekend?Yes the Great British public will make the country gag on the smell of charred dead animal. Men folk will go all hunter gatherer.Standing around the barbie,beer in hand and arguing with his mates."Put some more lighter fuel on" whoosh no eyebrows left.Or "It needs more coal","Hurry up I'm starving,e-coli I shit it".We are having one tomorrow,Jerk Pork,Jerk Chicken,Ribs,Steak all seasoned to perfection by Lady D's fair hand.Home made coleslaw the works.I'm in my element cooking for the family and three of her friends.They will arrive looking all smart and summery.I will assume the role of a white Benson,but come six o'clock when they have been necking Pinot Noir for around four hours,they will be wailing like a load of banshees.It's what we do the British.And for I one would not have it any other way.    

I have rambled on enough,I will be quiet now for a couple of weeks as work is very busy.Unless I can wangle a day off in the week to cast a line,which I doubt very much.So enjoy the weather and the rest of your weekend.

Be Lucky.

Monty D


  1. Ying said.....I shat yam not, Mr Monty, but I'm sat here with a wet teatowel on my red red yudd. Should have worn a titfer out, look you.

  2. I think you've had too much sun for one day mate :o)

  3. I still dunk me 'ob nobs in me tea ol' boy and you don't get further South without getting wet.
    I do have feet like Bilbo Baggins tho so 'fair one'. Don't forget yer Reggae Reggae sauce, put some music in yer food. Enjoy your weekend mate ;o)

  4. It were just as good in Woodies sunshine! However I am having a bit of a shaky moment now. I put it down to having warm thoughts about the Taffs and a Frenchman in the same day.
    16 41. 16 41. 16 41. 16 41. 16 41. 16 41. 16 41. 16 41. 16 41. 16 41. Sung to any tune you want mate.

  5. "Dave Gauntlett a ranting mad man"

    Pot kettle Jason pot and kettle my old fruit.