Tuesday, 23 July 2013

Nuff Said

I know I know I am a miserable old sod.But enough already,buying a paper for the next week is out of the question.Scared to turn on the television for fear of a gushing overload of forelock tugging.Even good old dependable left wing Radio Four has lost the plot.

I'm glad the family are all fit and healthy and I wish the young Prince a long and healthy life.But it's all to much for me.

But this made me chuckle out loud today when I spotted it,in the local shop.It is my kind of humour to a "T".

Be Lucky.

Monty D.

Saturday, 20 July 2013

Staying Local

This morning I paid my first visit this season to my local river with the intention of having a mornings trotting.On the walk down to where I wanted to fish,the river was low and sluggish.This beat really does suffer from the doldrums in the summer when we have no rain what so ever.Even so on the twenty minute walk to where I wanted to be,I was still surprised to see the bank completely empty of anglers.

I fancied this area as know one can fish above you for about a hundred yards and the same from below.Also it does has a good flow of oxygenated water going through it that I assumed would be beneficial today.I started to trot the far bank and the float was not going through how I wanted it too,a stiff downstream wind was hampering my presentation.A better float angler than I may have fared better and after half an hour for two Minnows I gave up.

I slung a Barbel rod out under the near bank about thirty yards down stream.Your fishing for one Barbel a session down here these days,so the one cast with a boilie and a bag full of chops I sat back.Not a touch until noon when a very violent take with out any warning occurred.The rod bent then snapped back lifeless.In between the worst of curses I checked the end tackle and the hook link had parted mid way down.Now I'm one of these fastidious bores with my rigs,checking knots through a small magnifying glass and checking my main line and hook links for any little imperfections.If I'm not happy I'll start over.

I put a small bomb on and had a lead about,snagged,snagged,snagged all the way down the near bank run.It appears since I last fished this swim back in September last season,the winter floods had deposited god knows what in the vicinity.Crass bad angling is that,not to have a lead about prior to fishing and I've only myself to blame.I did it on opening night on the Severn,but not today.I'll not self flagellate,but I'm still a bit pissed off.With this river it could have been anything from a single figure fish to a good mid double,topping out heavier at the back end.

Walking back around 1300.Hrs the banks were still empty,like the others I'll give it a miss until we get some rain.

Snag city the inside run.


Enjoying The Ashes?It's great at the moment is it not?Last Sunday I still thought we would get that wicket after lunch and we did.Today is going well also,though I still think Broad should have walked in the first Test.It is all well and good pundits and ex-players stating that batsman don't walk in the modern game.Who cares really,well I do.Football is played by a load of cheating,coning bastards.Athletics appears to be riddled with drug use.But Cricket I think should still be played with some moral stance.Just because so and so does not walk,it does not follow suit that you should be a lemming also.Yes winning is important,but to me it is how you win and last weekend was not the correct way.

This made me laugh though,the advert was in yesterdays Times news paper.Paddy Power has got it spot on again with their marketing.Though the way Cook is batting he may well have been at the crease since 1770.

Time for a cold bottle of Thatchers cider,so enjoy the rest of your weekend.

Be Lucky.

Monty D.

Saturday, 6 July 2013

British and Irish Lions

Class sheer class.What can you say about that? A total annihilation of the Wallaby's.Now I sorted my tackle last night,deliberating whether to go fishing or pop into the Dukes Head to watch the final Test.I chose the rugby.I can go fishing more or less when I want within reason,but with it being scorching hot the lure of ice cold cider and male bonding won out.The first Lions tour win since 1997 and we stuffed 'em 16-41.Warren Gatland made a brave decision to drop Brian O'Driscoll for the final test,raising more than a few eyebrows myself included.But he has been exonerated with this great,great result.We started well,then let the Wallaby's back into it near the end of the first half and had a slight wobble at the start of the second half.But class will out ;-0

But the scrummage won the match today.We had a decent ref this time out who in my eyes recognised what a "Scrum" should be.I thought we have been harshly penalised  in the previous two tests.I reckon the principality will be celebrating long into the night and rightly so.

Next up The Ashes and more pain I hope for Australia.Having such close links as country's it is like the home nation games of football from years gone by.No hatred what so ever,gloating rights rule the day.That is what sport should be,played with passion it hurts when you loose and elation when you win.Today I'm the latter.

The demise of biscuit dunking has been on my mind a little lately.I just do not see anyone in the South East partake in this great British ritual.And you know who I blame for this phenomenon,Chandler and his friends.You see it's been so trendy for a while now,oh so achingly trendy to "chill" in a coffee shop and look kewl.

When it's not really trendy it just makes you seem like some bourgeoisie wanker and in essence your probably on benefits,sitting in a coffee shop wearing threadbare second hand clothes and a battered copy of The Iliad.Just do not tell Dave Gauntlett that over on Fatwa,for he is a ranting mad man!No the Great British public I beseech thee,put down the "Skinny Decaff","The Mocha" or what ever else and get dunking and put the great back into Great Britain.

The Great British summer has arrived at long last.The parks will be awash with semi naked flesh,being slowly burnt to a crisp.The beaches will be packed with barely room to swing a cat.Old men asleep in their deckchairs,the better half sitting next to him knitting.Kids bawling as they have dropped their ice cream,that has cost Dad the best part of a weeks wages.

We just do not do it with the style and panache of our Mediterranean cousins.They know how to dress with grace and elegance.Your average British male starts OK at the top.Maybe a Panama tiffter,nice polo shirt and some natty shorts.But then they ruin it all with sandals and feet like these!

Gents it is just not on.This is one reason why a Peacock has got that distinctive cry.Their is your Peacock,his going out(or if your Micky Flannagan his going out,out),looking for his Peahen to give her a large portion of well,you can guess.His strutting along thinking "I'm the don of all Peacocks" looking at his reflection in the shop window until he looks down and clocks his feet and then "Meeeeeeeeeewwwwww,Meeeeeeewwwww".Men of Great Britain may I suggest if you have an inherent need to go sock-less,try and cover up with some nice loafers if your over 40,trainers are permissible for the under 40's,not white Reeboks though unless you live on a sink estate and are called Kyle,Reece or Jason.

Hands up who is not having a BBQ this weekend?Yes the Great British public will make the country gag on the smell of charred dead animal. Men folk will go all hunter gatherer.Standing around the barbie,beer in hand and arguing with his mates."Put some more lighter fuel on" whoosh no eyebrows left.Or "It needs more coal","Hurry up I'm starving,e-coli I shit it".We are having one tomorrow,Jerk Pork,Jerk Chicken,Ribs,Steak all seasoned to perfection by Lady D's fair hand.Home made coleslaw the works.I'm in my element cooking for the family and three of her friends.They will arrive looking all smart and summery.I will assume the role of a white Benson,but come six o'clock when they have been necking Pinot Noir for around four hours,they will be wailing like a load of banshees.It's what we do the British.And for I one would not have it any other way.    

I have rambled on enough,I will be quiet now for a couple of weeks as work is very busy.Unless I can wangle a day off in the week to cast a line,which I doubt very much.So enjoy the weather and the rest of your weekend.

Be Lucky.

Monty D

Wednesday, 3 July 2013

Place Your Bets

News came into the Yat Phone early today that Mr.Rich Frampton has resigned his tenure from the committee of the Barbel Society.On his Face Prowler page he said something along the lines of"It is with great regret that I have resigned my position within the Barbel Society,no matter how hard I tried some people are impossible to work with"

Now Rich and I have had various banter over the years on forums and text messages.But now some credit,where credit is due.Rich organised the last Barbel Society Show back in June,friends of mine who were there told me it was brilliant.They had a really good time and Rich it seems pulled it off.He worked so hard on this event that he did not have time to partake in the annual BS ritual of "Spawn Spotting",what ever happen'd to that directive?

So Rich I reckon it's a BS loss and I mean that.Like Fred you can now switch off and just go fishing,away from the worries of protocol.Just happy to be free to do as you want,when you want.

So who was it that Rich felt he could no longer work with,now a good book maker always needs an edge.Here at Yat Rock we employ a varied team of scouts across the globe,who give us feed back enabling us to form a market.

And we have come up with these odds below.

Fred Crouch 100/1
Peter Wheat  150/1
Steve Pope    10/1
Pete Reading  Even Money
Martin Howell 200/1
Don Caliendo 250/1
Phil Buckingham also 250/1
Dave and Mal 1000/1
Rob Hilton 5/1 (Sorry Rob) ;-)
Simon Asbury 150/1
A 1000/1 bar the rest.

So who's your money on?Roll up roll up and place your bets.Telephone bets only please.

The Barbel Society Committee.
Vice President
Secretary and Research & Conservation Chairman
Executive Officer
Executive Officer
Membership Secretary
Barbel Fisher Editor + Merchandise
Website Manager
Conference Organiser
Fisheries Manager
Newsletter Editor

And gent's keep it clean and nice,no vitriolic anti who ever comments will be published.It is just a gentle little piss take as I have been well behaved for so long.I know who my money is on though ;-0.

Be Lucky.

Monty D