Thursday, 21 March 2013

Hacked Off

Anyone else hacked off at present?Before I start,their may be the odd profanity or two that slips into this blog entry,so if you are easily offended please stop reading now......The river season has drawn to a close,a cold and wet one mostly this passed winter.I did not bother to cast a line,on the last day of the season,minus five on the Wednesday night and I just could not be bothered to drag my arse down the river,it's not warming up either by the look of things before Easter,so bang goes my trip to Marsh Farm.Hacked off with the weather as most of us are.

Now to the "Hacked Off" group,who have pushed for changes in the way in which our news is reported in the media.Two real stand up members of society who have been very prominent in this campaign.Max Mosley and Hugh Grant,take a bow you guys.Not one person can convince me that this campaign is about helping "ordinary" people.Yes it's deplorable that the likes of the Dowlers and the McCanns were subjected to a massive invasion of privacy due to phone hacking.That is illegal,so we do surely not need another law to counteract this? No in my very humble opinion,it is all to do with keeping the underhand acts of our so called celebrities out of the press.Dress it up as you like,but that is how I feel,though our so called stars are not shy in courting the press when they have a film,book or music deal to brag about.

I Blew Hugh

Next up we have the MP for  Paisley and Renfrewshire North Jim Sheridan.Now good old Jim is frankly aghast that "parasitical" political sketch writers are allowed to be in parliament and I quote"I don't know why they are allowed to come into this place?" Blimey Jim your not happy old son are you.Perhaps,just perhaps you and your ilk are still smarting over the expenses scandal.This moral high ground from an MP who claimed  for a 42 inch plasma TV and get this,an ivory leather bed.What a total wanker you are Jim.We can not allow the powers that be in this land,to dictate what we read and how we read it,just to suit them!

The Budget,well that hacked me off too.The phrase"It's a Budget for people who work hard and aspire to get on". Nonsense,who likes to work hard,not I that's for sure.Not one day goes past when the alarm goes off at 04.45Hrs and I think oh fuck this.Most people work as hard as we need to,we do not bust our balls.We do it out of necessity nothing more nothing less.An "aspiration nation",do me a favor.This was a Budget for piss heads,a penny off a pint of beer.If you drink ten pints a night,over the course of a year,you will save the princely sum of £36.50.And the way the MP's laughed and japed yesterday,the country is fucked,but hey it's all a good giggle.Still next year if the MP's get their way we will be viewing a test card and eating insects for dinner.As opposed to getting the news.

Hacked off from Yat Rock.

Be Lucky

Monty D

Saturday, 2 March 2013

The Humble Maggot

After the last few weeks of abysmal blanking,a new approach was needed to try and catch some Chub.Out went the cheese paste and bread.In came a couple of pints of red maggots.I stopped off in Kenny Collins Angling on the way home yesterday,picked up my bait,then went on to the local synagogue to get the Rabbi to bless my gentiles,oi vey,oi vey,following Friday prayer.

Moving downstream about five miles from my previous sessions,arriving at first light I picked a swim with a far bank snag.After half an hour I moved,it just did not feel right.That gut instinct we all get,that makes you move was nagging in my ear.I walked about a mile back from whence I came.

Casting out I settled back,praying,hoping that I would not have to post up yet another blog entry that shows my angling prowess to be zero.The tip moved just a little,my heart was thumping it has been so long.Hand hovering over the rod,tip goes round and yes a fish is on.A spirited little Perch was in the net,phew thank god for that.I did not trouble to weigh it,guessing it may have just shaded two pounds or so.

The bait goes back out and I get another little knock,here we go,here we go I'm on a roll.I struck another little pull and the fish came to the surface quickly,at first thinking it was a small Chub.Then it morphed into a nice Roach.I did weigh this though and it tipped the scales at 1lb 9oz.It Not as vibrant in colour as it's chalk stream cousins,but a nice Roach all the same.Life was looking up,I was catching again and the sun was out.

I have mentioned before I only tend to fish short sessions,it's all about grabbing a few hours when I can and fitting my angling around the real world.I fished on until noon and had a further five Perch all about this stamp below and two small Roach.No Chub though and I thought the river looked good for a couple.Not that I am complaining all the same,it was a relief to catch a few fish.

Now the weather next week is getting very mild,Barbel anglers everywhere will be girding there loins.Forum chatter will reach a crescendo as the gods of Barbeldom you know where,post about the last chance for a Boris,Whisker,Bar of Gold etc,etc.But this scene may be played out,underwater on a river near you.Here lay Frank and Fred.

"Alright Frank"
"Alright Fred,you heard the news?"
"No mate I have not,whats up?"
"Temperature rise next week me old son"
"Oh for Fooks sake,here we go again,that lot will be clomping down the bank,three ounce leads on our heads,fooking Garlic fooking Spam"
"Your not wrong,If I see one more lump of Garlic Spam this season,well I will turn into a Barbel bulimic"
"Look at Charlie Chub over their,pissing his self laughing"
"Oi Charlie you can get fooked,we aint having it,you are not getting this snag back!"
"Ready then Frank,stand firm old son,stand firm"
"Stand firm yourself Fred and take care"

Best self take photo ever?Yesterday I received a text late in the afternoon from Yessling Ying,letting me know he had caught a golden 15.10 Common from a local pool.Now Ying,as mentioned before,lives in the Forest of Dean.Inbred capital of the UK,where you are know one if you don't have a tail,six fingers on each hand or have cloven hooves as feet.

Well Ying looks like he has made a new game,spin the Carp.How on earth mate,did you manage this?Superb and I doff my cap.

That's it for another week,enjoy the rest of the weekend and tight lines if your out on the bank.

Be Lucky

Monty D