Tuesday, 30 March 2010

For The Romantics

Try this at home or not ?

The Karma Sutra position number 52.

"The Pirate"

When going at it "Doggy Style",just as you are about to come,pull out and spit on your beloveds back.So she thinks you have come.
When she turns around unleash a blast right in her face to stun and amaze her!

Known as the "Pirate"because she will put her hand over her eye and say "arrrrrgggghhhhh"


Do not blame me if it back fires though.

Monty

Saturday, 27 March 2010

Spring Forward



Not this year she's not,old Mother Nature is well behind this time last year.A friend and I had a trip out to a lake today(Saturday) that we had a few Tench from around this time last season.Cracking water of about eight acres,secluded and peaceful.


Looking at the place today,spring is well behind.Matey fished two rods with method feeders for a few Bream.While I float fished around where the Lilly Pads will eventually show,for a few Bream,Roach and a couple of small "Sniggs".


Looking at the weather forecast for the next few weeks,it does look like it will be another couple of weeks yet before things get going ?


The photo is of a couple of Carp,and a nice hot day.Just to remind us that summer is not far away?

Anyway back to "Sniggs".This is a word that the Midland lads use to describe Eels and I phoned my Midland contact the Bard of BridgeNorth in the week to enquire why ?It does help If you read BB's words in a strangled Yam Yam tone.....


MD in my cultured tone "Hello fella,why do you Midland lads call Eels "Sniggs" ?

BB "How the fook would I know,like" ? "We have always called 'em "Sniggs".


Helpful as ever the Bard.Still I love the word so If anyone can tell me why "Sniggs" I would love to know.


Now to a word I hate in some ways.CAMPAIGN!

Look around and you will see "anglers" on Internet forums saying"I am just about to start my Spring Carp CAMPAIGN".Or "A winter bait CAMPAIGN for Barbel","Tench CAMPAIGN".


No lads your going fishing,you are not invading Iraq,charging into Helmand Provence.Fishing that is all it is.

I have visions of these clowns head to toe in camoe,pulling up at a water(please god not mine) jumping out of their all terrain
"Hummers" and charging about like idiots.Anyone remember the closing scene from the Blues Brothers?When all the soldiers are ab sailing down the building going "hutt,hutt,hutt"


That is these lads who are starting a "Campaign".This is not a word I use often,but lads your nowt but C***s.

Honest chaps it's just fishing and it's to be enjoyed.If It's a battle,then quit!

Just my view though :-}

Friday, 26 March 2010

Friday's Tip

The weekend is nearly here and I know many of todays young people like to indulge in drugs on Friday and Saturday nights.A word of advice from one who is way passed that!

If you do mix copius amounts of "Charlie" with gallons of fizzy larger.And you feel a fart coming on ?Think long and hard before letting rip!It does have a tendancy to follow through so to speak.

That's my Friday tip to you 18/30 year olds.

Enjoy your weekend.

Thursday, 25 March 2010

Only In America

I got this from a friend who now resides back in his native Montanna(And he don't even fish).

"So they just passed a health care plan written by a committee who's chairman said he did not understand it(I thought the US did not have Barbel ? ),passed by a Congress that exempts themselves from it,signed by a President who smokes,with funding administered by a Treasury cheif who did not pay his taxes,all to be overseen by a surgeon general who is obese.....And better yet financed by a country that is broke.REALLY!!!."

Guess you could say that my friend is not an Obama supporter?See I did sneak a little angling quip in.

God Bless the NHS.

Wednesday, 24 March 2010

Sex Life Need A Boost?

As we get older our sex life may go down hill ?We do not have the "get up and go" of years before.We are not a strong as we once were ?Sure we may wax lyrical down the pub to our peers of how much of a love god we are ?

But help may be at hand(not in the real sense) I hasten to add!

Onthophagus taurus is a type of dung beetle and has been named as the contender for the title of the world's strongest insect.It can pull a load 1,141 times it's own body weight.The equivalant of a human pulling six fully laden double decker buses.

The strength according to the insect experts is down to it's curious sex life.Apparently Female beetles dig tunnels where males mate with them.If a male enters a tunnel already occupied by a rival,they lock horns and try to push each other out.

How does this help us ?I would suggest sneaking into in the dead of night,your local insect emporium and nabbing a few.Take these home and while your partner lounges back on the bed(It matters not what sex your partner may be),put a few around the entry to your bedroom.Then tape two forks to your head and go down on all fours and get the buggers out.This will help you get stronger and make your partner moan with longing over your macho stance.Also you can cook the beetles for a post coitus snack.

Hey no one said it was going to be all angling.


Lastly to the three chaps who were spotted angling out of season for Barbel on the Wye today.Pack it in you have been warned!!


Monty

Tuesday, 23 March 2010

A funny thing happened on the way to the Forum

Or not as the case may be?

Angling forums in general have a place in the mordern day world or do they?Sure they are great for anglers who wish to meet new friends.Swap information on tackle and ideas.That is fine by me but what about catch reports on your lakes,canals and rivers?

How do you feel? When one day the waters you fish all of a sudden get's very busy oweing to some buffon posting information for every man and his dog to digest?Is this person trying to help?Or is he trying to play the big "I AM".

I know what I think!! But it often falls on deaf ears as anglers now seem to have less and less time.And want maximum results with less effort.And we all know the bigger the capture the better the angler?Right?Not in my eyes.

Years ago anglers went and fished waters and found out what lurked beneath the depths with hard work and graft.Now they just "lurk" if that is the right wording?On internet forums and look for snippets of information.It's all me,me,me.Not all but the many.

Of course "matey" who spews fourth the info get's plaudits and some angling hero status for helping out.When indeed it's another nail in the coffin for the magic of angling.One day I hope they sit back and think...........You know I should really have put in my brain,prior to posting that.

But then again I will not hold my breath.Perhaps it is I that has it all wrong? And I must embrace fully this angling forum and it's Brother Hood?


Yep It's probally me just getting old?Who knows to be honest?

It's just my view from Yat Rock

Hello

I'm new to this blogging caper and do not really know why I thought it would be a good idea?Very bland start I except but their you are.

What do I intend to blog about?What ever comes to mind to be honest and it will be just my view from up on high at Yat Rock.Angling,Sport,Music what ever pops into my mind on any given day.

Most things in life get me cross now,but that is a sign of old age.Less tolerant of mankind,more so with nature.

Monty